silly me.

When I first broke onto the corporate sales and marketing scene, I panicked a bit. More than anything, I wanted to be taken seriously. So I chopped my locks to a sensible bob, put my best [boxed] brunette forward, and invested heavily in mock turtle necks... and slacks.

Silly me. 

Changing up your look is fine. I should know, I do it all the time. But there was no need to adhere to some preconceived professional image I'd conjured up out of insecurity. As it turned out, the more I tried to blend, the more I stuck out like a sore thumb. I mean, I could dress in a shroud, if I thought that might help matters, but the moment I open my mouth-- it's over. I'm packin' opinions, people. And I'm not afraid to voice them.

Still, vocal or not, the wardrobe malfunction played on and played out and I wish somebody had bothered to shake me... slap a little sense into my numb skull. Alas, no one ever did. Thankfully, I finally clued in. Besides, you can only sport mock turtles for so long. Sooner or later, you get up the nerve to stick your neck out.

Lately, I've been given a lot of credit for my saucy, outspoken writing style. While I appreciate the kudos, I'm even more grateful that I've been accepted for my goofy self as a human being/business owner. In my humble opinion, it's absolutely, positively okay to show up for work in jeans and low-top Cons, so long as the work produced is taken seriously.

And I do take my work seriously.

Now, I'm not saying that everyone should scrap their professional duds and show up as though it were casual Friday-- Monday through Friday. That's not my point at all. Besides, life without stilettos and pencil skirts is a very sad existence, indeed. This isn't even about style do's and dont's. I mean puh-lease, if not for my 'tween aged daughter's input, I'd be the biggest fashion victim ever. No, no, no... this is about being comfortable in your own skin, saying what you mean, and being sold on your own ideas. Because if you can't get real with yourself, then really, you're being misrepresented by your best advocate. And no one is going to put faith in a fraud.  

At least not for long.

Let's just get one thing straight. No matter how talented you are, no matter how clever, no matter how much heart and grit you possess-- not everyone is going to think you're wonderful. In fact, the inevitable result of putting yourself out there in a public light is that people will form an opinion, one way or another... and often times, it's the less desirable of the two. You have to be cool with yourself first, or the criticism and competition will crush you. You've got to dig in, do your homework, and be prepared for people to come at you with the most invasive, abrasive questions:  

  

 What makes you think you're qualified? 

 What makes you better than the other guy? 

 Who do you think you are, anyway?

Seriously? Yes, I'm afraid so. I know it can be intimidating [even infuriating] but try to take it in stride. Often times it's just posturing. And if you aren't phased, the other guy's not in control of the exchange. The best thing you can do is look 'em in the eye and smile, wait your turn to speak, and choose your words carefully. But most importantly, if someone is acting like an utter tool, there's no sense wasting your energy returning the sentiment, or lack thereof.

Don't engage. I'm serious about this! Nothing good will ever, ever come of it. Let it go and move on. Besides, why on Earth would you want to work with someone who rubs you the wrong way? There are plenty of deals out there, and life is too short to do business with bullies. Trust your gut and do the right thing. If you're consistent, everything else will fall into place.